Four Things I Do To Feel Inspired

1. Make a mood board. Whether with paper, magazines, glitter & photos, or even just on Pinterest; I always come out feeling so much more inspired by creating a visual collection of things I like. Don't think too hard about it, just collect and put things together which appeal to you visually. Include quotes, reminders of happy moments or snail mail. If you can display this over your desk or somewhere you'll see it often, it will bring you a pinch of inspiration in a flash.

2. Look back. Sometimes looking back over my archive of work, and reflecting at what I've already achieved can really help to give me current ideas. Look over things you forgot you wrote about, did you fully explore that topic? Could it be extended in any way or possibly redone differently? Has an old project inspired other work you haven't talked about or shown yet? I find looking over the past helps me evaluate where I am and what I'm still yet to conquer.
3. Do what you love. Forget the stress for the time being, and go do something you love. Read, workout, sew, hang out with friends, watch a movie.. whatever. Taking your mind away from the problem and filling your thoughts with happy things is good for it. Think of it like 'cleansing' your brain. It keeps it refreshed and will help when you go back to the drawing board. If like me you blog about what you love, doing these things will probably make you think of an idea related to them anyway!

4. Think ahead. Say for example I'm at a loss for what things I can blog about in the next week or two. I take the pressure off by forgetting about the next two weeks completely. I think about next month, or even the month after. Are there any seasonal projects I would like to do, or upcoming events/issues I want to write about? Plan those instead. It might seem counter-intuitive but I can't even go into how many times this has helped me. By taking the pressure off the now, and instead looking forward, I begin to feel productive again and it actually helps me with ideas for the present anyway! Also, this sort of planning ahead means less chance of it happening again next month..

Dork Things: Comics

Hello lovelies! :) Today I wanted to share a little piece of myself with you guys that you probably don't know about me yet. Part of what I like to call, my 'dorkier' side. For as long as I can remember, I have loved various forms of Art, Illustration and Design. Hence me studying it at college and university for years. I've never called myself a 'comic book kid' because people only associate that with Superman, Spiderman and other general superhero/Marvel characters. Which are completely and utterly awesome by the way. I am team Batman always (my bat tattoo agrees) and I pretty much love any Marvel film, but I've never even tried the comics truthfully.
But my love for Graphic Art and Illustration has led me many times in the past perusing through small comic book stores and still getting a kick out of being surrounded by amazing Art and (usually) plenty of geeks. I mean no offense, I feel at home with the geeks. I was never the cool kid. I am a dork (distant relative of the Geek), hence my blog name.
Back when I was around 16 I happened to be browsing a comic book store in Liverpool, and came across a small series hidden near the back called 'Lenore, The Cute Little Dead Girl', by Roman Dirge. 

The Gothic theme, the childlike yet amazing illustrations and the humorous/strange stories had me at once. Also it helped that the whole comic was based on a girl that was totally gothic, and not at all sexual or provocative. There are too many of those comics.. I was utterly hooked standing there reading through them all in the middle of the store, in my black skinny jeans, long emo hair and a My Chemical Romance tshirt. Yes, I was one of those kids., and I loved it. In fact, I still do. I've just become more open to pastels and makeup other than heavy black eyeliner now. Anyway I bought all the ones I could find available that very same day, and rushed home to devour them all at once.

My love for Lenore was born and over the years I've tried to get my hands on as many issues as possible including the beautiful collectors editions books. Lenore isn't a huge comic by most standards. Sure it's easy enough to find on Google, but I've yet to meet any other fans since I discovered her.

Lenore has encouraged me to branch out and explore other comics too over the years, usually smaller less heard of comics. That's not to try to appear hipster and cool, it's literally because I'm too intimidated to buy any more well known ones because of the Fandom. 

I don't know all the back stories, the biographies and ins and outs of certain characters in the 'bigger' comics, so I feel less connected to them. Also, as much as I would love to meet other Lenore fans, I think a part of me honestly enjoys that I've felt like I've had her to myself all these years :) I'm pretty damn set on getting a Lenore tattoo one day.

Thanks for reading guys, hope you enjoyed getting another little snippet into my life.

What 'Dorky' things do you like/collect?

When Your Best Friend Is Gay..

*My version of this story

When your best friend is gay, you know it before her. 
You openly joke about it and it becomes 'a thing' you both laugh about. Silly things, become a long running joke. Everyone's in on it. It takes a while but it starts to sink in, in your mind. And you realise you believe what you've been joking about for the longest time. You wouldn't be surprised if she told you she was gay. 
So the jokes become a little bit less, just in case. You worry in case you end up offending her if it were ever true, (I shouldn't have worried, the jokes are even more now!). A long time passes and nothing is ever said. And you worry in case you're not the kind of person she can talk to. Or maybe, just maybe you were wrong?

She's very close to a certain girl, she's moved away by this point and you're both a little distant. Maybe she's just made a new friend. Maybe you're both just losing touch now.
Probably not. The distance means you can't see each other much, but it hasn't stopped the calls, or messages even just every now and again. You both still laugh as hard as ever and do stupid shit as soon as you spend time together. It doesn't feel as if you've grown apart at all. When you need her, she's still there. When you call her up crying, and you're having the worst year of your life; she's there. When someone breaks your heart and leaves you weak, and ruined for the most part; she's there. When you find out your Dad has suddenly died out of nowhere, you call her. You lie on the floor in pieces and pray for the world to close in on you. But still, you call her. Hundreds of miles away, and she still makes you feel as if she's next to you. The world is black, but she's in the dark with you.

And one night drunkenly, she seems like something is bothering her. She's not the type to get emotional after a drink so you know it's not that. And then she says she wants to tell you something, and you realise this is it. This is the moment you wondered if she'd ever share with you. And you know exactly what she's going to say, but you can't rush her or push it at all...
And then you know. She's finally admitted it after years of you wondering/knowing/guessing, and the stupid sod thinks you'll judge her, be different or feel weird around her. It's almost laughable.
So time goes by, and she becomes more open with you over time. The jokes never stop, in fact they're probably worse than ever. But you both laugh just as hard and it's such a relief to be so honest with each other. You are now lucky enough to be included in this part of her life, which she could have well kept private. You are lucky enough to meet her girlfriend, and have the pleasure of seeing them happy together. You are even lucky enough to be one of the first to hear they are engaged, and you couldn't be more excited!
Ultimately though, when your best friend is gay...

Nothing changes.

This Week On Instagram

I've been a little more creative this week, even though I still haven't ventured inside my Art Journal. I'm sure I will soon.. I've been playing around with different nail art, making and sending postcards as part of my Postcrossing project, and most importantly.. The Travelling Blogger's Book!
The TBB was started by Gemma from Lipstick & Lashes, and it's such a wonderful idea! I recently completed my page for it, and will be sending it off on Thursday/Friday when I'm off work. I haven't posted a pic yet but I will after I've sent it, as I don't want to ruin it for the next person hehe :)
This week has been a busy but great one! Lots of creativity, starting at my new job (which has been good!) and dying my hair very dark brown/almost black again. I gave in. I was supposed to be lightening it but the Autumn/Winter time always makes me want to be dark.. Plus I can always add a flash on blue/purple to make it more interesting!
Music wise I've been listening to lots of Jenny Lewis (The Voyager is an amazing album!) especially 'Just One of the Guys'. It's such a catchy song, and the video is brilliant. It doesn't hurt that it has Kristen Stewart in too, because I pretty much adore her. I know a lot of people dislike her, but I just think she's perfect ♥
Anyway! Thanks for popping by guys :) I'm gona be in work when this post goes live, so leave me a hello and I'll get back to you! 

Thoughts & Goals

We're coming to the end of September, already.

I have no idea where this year has gone. It doesn't feel so long ago that we brought in the New Year, or I had my birthday. But here we are, the last part of the year seeping in. As this time draws in, I've been thinking about small goals for these last three months and what I'd like to achieve. I'm not necessarily talking about the big goals, just the little daily/weekly ones we think of as we go along.
You see I'm a great fan of a to-do list. I have one for every single day, which I realise makes me sound robotic and boring. It really works well for me though. Having a small (even simple) to-do list makes me feel a little better and more accomplished. It helps me remember the important and the not so important things, and it brings me a sense of calm. Even if I just write a list of house chores, blog post ideas or things I can do that make me happy; I write them and I feel much better. Call me weird.
So my daily hopes, thoughts and to-do lists are always on the forefront on my mind anyway. It isn't hard to understand then why I've started thinking about what I'd like to achieve in these next three months before we bring in the New Year again.  I'd like to share these hopes with you.
*I want to finish my reading challenge before the year is up. *I want to carve my first pumpkin.

*I want to walk, run, or be active everyday.

*I want to learn a new recipe and blog about trying it.

* I want to design my next big tattoo.

*I want to drink more water.

*I want to be more involved with my family.

*Buy my Christmas presents early.

*I also want to make a lot of my Christmas presents.

*I want to have adventures with Gary.

*I want to make friends in my new job.

*I want to save whatever I can for moving after New Year.

*I want to arrange a day out with a distant friend.

*I want to be panic attack free.

*I want to be creative on a regular basis.

*I want to discover somewhere new.

What will you guys be doing/planning before the year is up? :)

DIY: Cute Nails Made Easy

We all like to jazz up our nails every now and again don't we? No? Okay this post isn't for you sorry! Personally I change my nails every few days and I never have them bare. I'm impatient mind, so they're never in pristine condition. I tend to just slap some polish on and go, and half the time I smudge it before it's even dry.
So this means although I have a Pinterest board full of gorgeous nail DIY's, I'm usually too clumsy or impatient to be able to do any of them. So I made my own! 
This little DIY is so easy, even I can do it!

Lovely! Easy peasy right? I challenge you to mess this up.

The only tip I will offer is be patient and make sure your nails are 100% dry before putting on or removing the tape. Or it will smudge and ruin your work within seconds.

What do you think lovelies? I personally love the white/pastel coloured attempts I did. But I wanted to show how you could do it with darker colours and look more 'polished' than playful if that's your thing.

Let me know what you think :) !

Estée Lauder Double Wear Review

I'm quite pale but not perfectly porcelain. I'm not one to wear tonnes of makeup, but I still wear enough everyday to cover blemishes, dark circles, and in extreme heat; my many freckles. Speaking of heat, whenever there's the tiniest bit of humidity in the air, or I'm particularly anxious or nervous (daily basis..), my makeup disappears and I look like I've been dragged through a hedge. 
This has come to be the norm for me unfortunately. If I go on a night out, I have to fill my little handbag with my foundation and powder, as well as other necessities like my phone, money for shots, and my address written down for the cab driver ;) Not great unless you love taking a huge bag out with you..
Until NOW. Last week I finally got around to buying Estee Lauder Double Wear, and I was so excited as I'd heard such good things about it. 

I had £10 in rewards available on my Debenhams Beauty card, and there was no way I was letting that bad boy go to waste. I had a look around online, and decided to finally go for '2N1 Desert Beige' as it looked very close to my natural colour, maybe a subtle shade darker - which is what I'd prefer. So I risked it and ordered it. I have to say I'm extremely lucky, because it is such a perfect shade for my skin! And I got to avoid the girls at the beauty counter, yaaay! You feel me yeah?

I was hoping for a gorgeous medium coverage, something that would make my skin look soft and.. well, perfect. Something that would apply really easily over my skin, without looking cakey. What I got was all this and more. I mean it's called Stay in Place Makeup. But now that I've explained how makeup has never stayed in place for me, I hope you can see just how much I really didn't expect this. But oh my god does it STAY. I've given it over a week now to test this out in various situations, and it has passed each test with flying colours. 

Even yesterday, I applied it in the morning at around 8:30am, shown below. Sorry it's not the best photo, it's the best I could get before I rushed out the house!

And I spent the very warm day shopping, lugging around bags, coming home, cleaning and tidying for hours, then finally chilling out in the evening. Then I remembered to get another photo before the daylight totally went..

I know it's always hard to tell with other people's skin, especially when you guys haven't seen me without makeup. But trust me on this - this is still SO in place and held perfectly all day. I didn't touch it up once, not even after getting a bit clammy in the heat. The only thing that needed reapplying was my lipstick and eyeliner. So I just need to find the perfect replacements for those now...

But really guys, I know you've probably seen hundreds of reviews on Double Wear and how great it is. So if you've bothered reading this then thank you so much. I really wanted to reiterate what many other bloggers have said though, and confirm it really is as good as it claims to be. It's just a shame it's not so cheap.. But at least my handbag is much lighter now for nights out!

Here's to being skint forever now. Bye. x

Milan Fashion Week

I know I already did a post lusting over London Fashion week and my favourite pieces, but seriously the love is never ending. I've been peeping away at the goings on at Milan, and have fallen in love all over again. I have to share some of my favourites with you guys, and obviously this is gonna be a photo heavy post, so sit back, relax and enjoy.. Esme Vie

LFW Lust ♥

Everyone's gone Fashion week mad, and is it any surprise when we're seeing beautiful things like this? These are my highlights so far, my personal faves!

I'm always gonna love Ashish, always.

But there have been so many other designers who have stolen my heart this week too. Especially Ryan Lo and Temperley London. I'm loving all the pastels and the striking modern cuts mixed with softer elements.

Have you been lusting over any particular designers during LFW?

Problems Of A Plus Size Blogger

Let me start by saying the blogging community is amazing! These past six months have been nothing but refreshing and kind to me because of blogging. There is a place for everyone in the blogging community whatever gender, size, race, age, or niche. But what if like me, sometimes you feel a little out of the loop? It can feel like you're a bit lost sometimes.

You see I'm a plus size girl, and a blogger. But not a 'Plus Size Blogger'.. Or am I? I'm not sure of the rules. I'm a UK size 16-18 depending on the store and how my boobs are feeling on the day, lol. There are so many beautiful, inspiring and just lovely plus size bloggers out there who do their thing brilliantly and leave you feeling better as a plus size girl, if you need it. The reason I feel a little outside of any particular blogging niche though, is that I'm not sure where I fit! For lack of a better pun..

Because although I fit the physical criteria, I definitely don't fit the mental criteria for a PS blogger, I don't think so anyway. You see I'm not happy being this size, I'm very insecure and I doubt I could inspire anyone. Let me just say right now though, this is NOT to say I think people should fit a certain size standard, and there are so many plus size women I can think of who are sexy, confident and perfect just the way they are. In fact, I'm jealous of anyone comfortable in their own skin. Whether its someone of a size 6, or a size 20. But me? Well no, I'd much rather I was a little smaller, stronger and healthier. And I do think I'd be happier then with my own body. But that's just me, I'm not saying there's any right or wrong here.

So plus size bloggers are a wonderful thing, but they seem miles away from where I'm at. Who would I be to encourage anyone to feel good in their own skin, when I don't? And I don't usually blog about being plus size, or any of the issues regarding being PS before now. So it feels like I'm not putting myself in the right category if I say I'm a PS blogger.

Sometimes I even find myself feeling restricted when blogging. Outfits of the day are popular among all bloggers, from small to larger lovelies. And I love seeing them, getting inspired by them and taking some tips. God knows I could use it, haha. I'd love to do some myself, but I find myself always shying away from it whenever the thought occurs. I find myself feeling just outside the loop of Fashion bloggers and Plus Size Fashion bloggers. I'm too big for one, and not open or confident enough for the other. I'm a blogger who likes to blog about everything, except the one thing that leaves me feeling insecure. 

I look forward to going to my first blogger event one day, hopefully soon. But I do worry I'll stick out like a sore thumb. I do worry people will be judging me, or mentally putting me in the PS blogger category, which would be great if I felt I fit in with them. But as we've established, I feel outside the group there too.

You may think I'm silly for thinking this way, and maybe I am. But I did just want to voice some of these thoughts I have, and wonder if anyone else feels this way too? Also please, please do not think this is a whining 'oh woe is me' post. I genuinely just want to share my views, express my feelings and include this part of me on my blog. After all this is my little home :) 

So let me know all your thoughts! And also THANK YOU so much for reading this!