What I Want To Be When I Grow Up

These days my life revolves around drawing, painting, writing and taking photographs. Every single day- God I'm lucky. It was always what I wanted growing up, and I always had trouble defining it. You're constantly asked what you would like to be when you grow up, rather than what you would like to do. Personally, I had a lot of trouble answering this question throughout my childhood, and right through my teens. I can remember giving a multitude of answers; 'writer' was always a frequent one, because I loved creating stories. Artist, graphic designer, photographer, fashion designer, teacher - these were just some of many answers throughout the years. I never quite knew which title fit me best, which box I should mould myself into.
I chose my college course on a spontaneous whim; I was initially going to study English Literature, Psychology and Art - each as a part time one lesson a week sort of deal. It still seems really appealing to me; combining creativity with knowledge and further factual learning. However on the day I went to enrol at college (a little hungover) I was told that if I studied Art part time, it would only be a few hours a week, and only Fine Art. So no digital design, no photography, no 3D design, no contextual studies and no textiles. Hmm. This didn't sit well with me. I took all of three seconds to decide my fate, and I guess ultimately shape the next few years of my life. I scrapped English Lit and Psychology, and told them to sign me up for full time Art and Design A Level. 
Then I went to the bathroom to throw up. Not from nerves or big decision making or anything, just the previous night's jagerbomb saying hello, of course.
Wow. It's crazy thinking back on this now. I made this life altering decision, not realising what an impact it would have. There are best friends I wouldn't have now, travels I wouldn't have been on, relationships I wouldn't have had... and maybe I wouldn't even be doing what I am today.
I had no plan, I didn't think what I'd end up being, or what career options I had. It was totally irresponsible and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. However, I did go with my gut (probably because it was shouting at me to hurry before it emptied remaining alcohol contents again) and it was the best thing I could have done. I ended up having the best time of my life on that course at college, and feeling so happy and inspired. As soon as I stopped trying to define myself and worrying about labels, I chose the right path. 
Now some of you already know that I went onto University, and ended up switching courses while there; from Graphic Design to Fine Art, before dropping out completely. This again just shows I clearly had no idea what I wanted and boxing myself into one idea never worked well for me.
Fast forward five years and I'm working from home every day CREATING. I still have no idea what to label myself when people ask. It's a constant mouthful of, 'Oh I blog, and draw and paint and design things and oh I dunno just some stuff...' So I think mostly I'd like to say I'm a creator. But how bloody pretentious is that??? Hmm.

My point is though, I'm doing a little of everything I love. I'm not rich, I'm not mega successful, but I am HAPPY. I am earning. I am trying to spread some joy, creativity and inspiration too. So maybe we shouldn't box people in. Maybe we should ask kids what they like doing, or what kind of person they want to be; rather than what job they want. Encourage them to explore who they are for themselves rather than rushing to tick a certain box.
A week or two ago, I was reminded of all I have to be grateful for, when Cass Art sent me a surprise gift in the mail. Without any prior warning or expectations set on me; they sent me out the most beautiful set of brand new Winsor & Newton pigment markers, which are set to be released November 1st.

I was absolutely thrilled to see such an encouraging and supportive attitude from my favourite art suppliers. The Winsor and Newton pigment markers are a brand new release, and of the highest quality. They each have two different end tips, for both brush-like strokes and fine, detailed work and come in over 100 colours. These guaranteed lightfast markers means up to 100 years without fading, so I know my work is going to last well. 
I have been using them so much for the past two weeks, that I was even inspired to start doing a new style of illustration available on my Etsy store; creating quirky little custom portraits for people. I have LOVED this. Loved, loved, loved. I feel like they've helped me discover a style I really like working in.
I am humbled and so inspired whenever I am shown encouragement from anyone, and this lovely package was no exception. A huge thank you to Cass Art for continuing to support me.
So these days, I've no idea what I want to be when I grow up. I only know that I will continue to explore the things I love doing, and pursue them with a fierce passion. I can't do it without the support I've been receiving though, and for that I thank all of you reading this post. I know it's a long one, but it's one I felt I had to share. 
It's okay to not know what you want to do with your life, I sure as hell don't.


*Quick note- This post is NOT sponsored at all. I have not been paid, and I was not expected to review these markers either. Cass Art simply continue to support local artists and I felt that was very important for to me to share with you guys. Thanks :)




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